I didn’t get to post this yesterday, Father’s Day, so I am posting today. Why not? It’s always a good day to celebrate Dear Ol’ Dad!
The following is an excerpt from the people chapter of my latest book Dream On It, Unlock Your Dreams, Change Your Life (St. Martin’s Press)
Father Traditionally, the father is the bread winner, the one that makes the decisions and wears the pants, as well as the one that tends to dole out the tougher discipline. Therefore, Dad in a dream often represents these roles within you. When you are having financial trouble, when you are faced with a tough decision, when you are having a job or career issue, or you need to assert yourself in some way during the day, don’t be surprised if dear old Dad makes an appearance in your dreams at night.
I dreamt that my father passed away, but when I visited his home he was there and helped me make his funeral arrangements.
– Jamie 28
Lauri: Unless you are concerned for your father’s health in real life, this dream is not about him at all. Your father is standing in for your own “inner father,” meaning the part of you that makes decisions and that brings home the bacon. For your father to die in a dream suggests that you feel your ability to make a good firm decision or your ability to bring home the bacon and manage said bacon is no longer available to you. So what’s the story? The way he helps you make the funeral arrangements leads me to believe this is about finances. Even though you may feel your financial savvy is dead in the water, your dreaming mind is reassuring you – through the form of your dad – that this part of you is alive and well. Your dream is also showing you that financial – rather than funeral – planning and arranging is the key. You can do it. Don’t be so quick to bury this part of you.
Jamie replies: I was feeling very “stuck” in my financial situation. I am a full time student, have a full-time job, and 2 little ones at home. It makes complete sense that I was trying to tell myself that I could find ways to lessen my burden through financial planning and arranging. And sure enough, when I started looking for alternative ways to earn a bit of extra cash I stopped having the dream!
Keep in mind, the father symbol is not meant to be sexist. Whether or not it’s true in an individual’s family, it’s true as a universal archetype. Even if one doesn’t perceive men as money makers and decision makers, it is the cultural norm, and the subconscious often subscribes to norms. I’ve found that men and women tend to dream of their father equally when facing financial issues. This archetype may change in time as more and more women take on the role of financial provider in the home. But for now, as far as the dreaming mind is concerned, Dad is the money man.
For men who are fathers, Dad in a dream often refers to his own role as a father, just as a woman’s mother in a dream can refer to her role as Mom. So Dads, the same rule applies to you. Any negative element to the dream is likely a reflection of your own frustrations with fatherhood. If you are not yet a father but are trying or hoping to be, you’re going to be dreaming of your own father quite a bit.
Dream On It is available at bookstores everywhere as well as at your favorite online retailer.
“This is a life changing book! Extremely well written, practical, serious, easy to read and with wells of real wisdom. Not a usual self-help book, but it sure will help you change your life. Outstanding!” – Margareta Hagglund, Editor Psykologi Magazine, Sweden